The Relationship
50She received a text that said “hug u for me”… she smiles and thought back on how it felt the hug, the feeling of peace.
So she sat back, wrapped her arms around herself and was just quiet and felt that peace again. He had that touch, she heard his heartbeat, she felt his warmth and she smiled and wrote him back.
“Glad things have changed between us… she replied.
They were now divorced, and was brought back into each others lives, after a 3 year separation and one year divorced.
It took him a couple of years to get the divorce, after not hearing from her, he decided that it was time.
She never wanted a divorce, she informed him that if he wanted one and since it was his decision to leave then it was his to get.
They hadn’t spoken in 2 years; they lived in different parts of the country. They were brought together by a family crises that she had decided to attend.
She loved his family; her mother –in – law was good to her. His sister, was so sweet, " I love talking to them both" she spoke, so she wanted to see them.
So she said out loud “I am still married to him, and this is important and I want to be there for them...” she smiled and made preparation to attend.
When they saw each other, it was excitement still. He looked at her, she looked at him, and both enjoyed seeing each other. Familiar territory…They embraced.
When he touched her he felt relieve, every time he would hug her he always felt good and that feeling was back and missed, she felt the same also, she exhaled.
You could tell that they were glad to see each other.
After the meeting, they went out with old friends, they both liked karaoke, and anyway, this would be a way to talk after in those couple of years of not talking.
Can marriages be healed after adultery? Can relationships mend in men and women who have had this experience?
Being hurt by people we trust, can be devastating, the good news is that it can be healed. and the good news is that sometimes when one door closes its making room for another door so you can walk in new opportunity. . So this saga begins…
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WEll said, thanks for your comment
You know relationships are a funny thing. I believe through lack of communication problems just start to pile up and people step on each other rules and invade each others space without even knowing it. A lot of times we don't even know our own selves truly, deep down inside, until we are put into a situation where we are uncomfortable. It has then probably gone too far and a split is inevitable unless some relearning can take place.
Madamlee, I totally agree with you, that's where it all start the lack of communication....
So as with this couple, the agreement to communicate to be upfront with what is dear to them, that is the key relearning each other...
Starting the slate clean... forgetting and forgiving as Ras said... I also believe that time for this couple to miss each other also can play an important part of the reconciliation they have had the time to do their own thing as it is said... Now they can talk....
Thanks Madamlee for your comment
There is no true recovery. Things are garbage after that. There will never be the trust there once was. Never. You can act like things are ok all you won't but you'll never forget. because of that it will never truely be the same.
Jay this is also true for so many. Thanks for your comment
Love like you've never been hurt before....Dance as if no one sees you......Sang as if no one hear you
Mohamedfigo... beautifully said...
Forgiving might be easier than forgeting. I think it is important to forgive and forget if the offending party is truly repentant. Both have to be relearn how to relate and communicate to each other so that old mistakes are not repeated.
If something bad happens, people should learn a lesson and try to find solution in the future. If you ignore and don't think about, things will become worst than it was before. From now on, I think new era began to them so they have to protect their relationship since it is kind of egg and it can be broken easily. So, let me say it is beautiful piece and I like when things come back normal. Thanks for sharing.
Neverletitgo, thanks for the comment and yes, the relationship is like an egg, great example...
Rasman1 21 months ago
I will do my best to answer your questions you posed. I marriage can survive adultery but it takes an extreme amount of forgiveness. If a person decides to forgive the perpetrator then the victim must let the past go and not bring it up again. This is the only way it will workout. Some say the forgive but the first spat they bring it up which is a sign that there was no true forgiveness. Also both have to recognize what caused the adultery in the first place and the role that each person played. Example If a woman believes she can put her man as last on her list. Deny him sex, affection, and acknowledgment then it is to be expected that he will stray away. Especially to a woman giving him what she is not. if she feels that it should not matter then in my opinion that is unrealistic and very selfish. She would basically being saying " I can treat you like crap and no matter what you should always be loyal to me" same goes for a man that neglects his woman. In theses cases a marriage can survive if both recognize the part they played. When it comes down to a person just being an adulterer without reason except they want to do or the give in to their lust of right now pleasure is a sign of poor character and these marriages will not survive such an event.